Why freelance instead of employed

I left a management position at a scale-up after four years spent first building its payments department, then its international banking connectivity. On paper, it was a good role: international scope, a team built from scratch, a subject as technical as it was strategic. Here’s why I left anyway.

The role I left

Four years at a fast-growing scale-up, split into two two-year chapters.

For the first two years, I helped launch the company’s payments department. In practice: direct back-and-forth with hundreds of banks across dozens of countries to adapt payment files to local specifics (ISO 20022 format), and leading the rollout of new payment rails, including ACH and CHAPS.

For the following two years, I held the role of Global Banking Connectivity Manager: leading international banking connections (SWIFT, Host-to-Host) and building a dedicated team from scratch.

The pace stayed intense throughout: client-facing work, project management, and product management running in parallel, plus a share of support on top. A role that could have lasted a long time.

The trigger

No slow build-up, no long silent deliberation. A specific disagreement with leadership — the kind of moment that isn’t resolved by one more conversation, and that suddenly makes it very clear the direction taken is no longer the right one. I won’t go into more detail here; that’s not the point, the clarity of that moment was.

Once the resignation was settled, I left for two and a half months in South Asia before even considering freelancing. After four years at a relentless pace, building teams inside a fast-growing company, I needed to reconnect with myself before starting anything new.

What turned out to be harder than expected

Finding the first clients. Not the technical side, not the admin: the sales side, the one a salaried job never really prepares you to face alone. Nobody sends you a project on reflex the first time; you have to make it happen yourself, without a sales network already built for it and without the instincts you only develop after years of prospecting.

Where I am today

Today, I’m a freelance IT and automation project manager. Three areas: documented automation (n8n, Zapier, Python, APIs), niche banking connectivity (SWIFT, EBICS, PSD2, ISO 20022, CFONB), and interfacing between business systems (line-of-business software, ERP) — the ground I’ve already covered for four years on the corporate side.

I’m currently on an IT project management assignment; I’m deliberately staying vague on that point, it’s not the subject here. What matters is that the choice still holds, several months on, with no significant regret to report. But between a role that no longer fit and the uncertainty of starting over with no safety net, the choice ended up making itself.